Freeasthewind

Eeeeek difficult questions and so early in the morning 6:50
1. There are crumbs in your bed cos lets face it you don't live in a showhome. What kind of cookies do those crumbs come from?

Grandma's big chunky chocolate chips

2. You are sitting on the toilet brushing your teeth cos you are hungover as normal.

It was a little or a lot of Captn' Morgan or alittle wine

3. You have been dumped cos well, lets face it .. you are a loser. What comfort food do you grab? (after sticking pins in a voodoo doll obviously)

Ben and Jerry's double chocolate fudge ice cream

4. Your wife/husband has pissed you off (that means angry in the US by the way ... not watersports) so you decide to go have an expensive gourmet meal on his/her credit card. What do you order?

Fly to a warm beach and sit and drink captn Moran with the sexist man I can find.

5. Sitting in church (waiting for the lightning to strike you) and you have a book/magazine tucked inside the hymn sheet. What is it? The latest James Patterson book

I tag MM,playwrite27, ashbourne2, Henrietteahenpot, jenray

Meet Bubba, men's answer to Maxine

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to
build up the required pressure.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
a woman's sex drive by 90%
It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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Women will never be equal to men
until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
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Send this to a few good men who need a laugh and to the select few women who can handle the truth !

AND MAXINE SAYS.....

Maxine just had to have the last word...lol